Surviving Marital Infidelity: Knowledge is Power
Learning about infidelity and extramarital affairs leaves you in a better state of surviving marital infidelity.
Not much is actually know in academic circles about the surviving marital infidelity. Those involved in the affair and the remaining spouse, as well as the other person, are extremely reluctant to divulge their feelings and thoughts. And so, solid resources for surviving marital infidelity have been sparse. (As Marriage and Family Therapist my training offered exactly NO input on how to help someone surviving marital infidelity.)
But, with the advent of the internet, things are changing. The internet provides a forum for anonymity and a place to ask pertinent and personal questions.
Read what these readers say about surviving marital infidelity through the acquisition of knowledge about infidelity:
“I wanted information. I wanted both experiential and clinical information. All was validating–that my desire to know, my behaviors and feelings were all normal. I learned about well meaning counselors causing more damage than harm. I learned that there are recovery “maps” available which allow me a time frame so as not to feel that recovery is taking forever. Particularly, I found articles in Journal of Marital and Family Therapy quite helpful, although academic. I did learn that, in order to heal the couple must move from blame to understanding.”
“The first few hours were the strangest. When I was told, I had a huge feeling of disbelief. I knew that something was up, but I had no idea of what it was. I didn’t sleep that night and the following morning I felt terrible and tired. I also felt helpless – that this was beyond my control. Three things happened which changed me. Firstly, I saw a psychologist – initially with a few to get her to see my partner. I was shown that my sense of guilt was not justified and that the problem was that of my partner. Secondly, I searched for knowledge on the internet and I discovered very quickly Break Free From the Affair. I bought it and I managed to pin point my affair. The insanity of what was happening I began to understand, was not me but my partner. I could begin to see a path that I could take – and I quickly saw some hope. Finally, I started sports – I concentrated on my physical self (I had lost a lot of weight within two weeks of learning). It helped me take my mind off what was happening – and to take my focus off my wayward wife. I was thinking about me – possibly for the first time in my relationship.”
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