Infidelity discovery and recovery: Getting the Right Kind of Support From Family and Friends
by Dr. Robert Huizenga – The Infidelity Coach
Involving family and close friends has its challenges.
If you think about including them in your support , it is important that the support be healthy. You want to stay away from triangulation, gossip, side-taking and people with strong opinions.
Infidelity Support Group
This is your safe place to meet and interact with others coping with and moving beyond infidelity. The Infidelity Support Group provides different features than the chat room, features that enable to you learn and receive support from others in more profound ways.
Due to the sensitive nature of this group, I have decided to make this a “closed” group. This means administrative approval is required for new members to join (although I will not be selective in who I approve, everyone is welcome).
Anyone can see the group information, but only the members will be able to see the following: the discussion board, the wall, photos and posted items. I have done this to ensure that all group members feel safe and can maintain as much privacy as possible.
Here’s the link to the Infidelity Support Group Page: (read instructions below before clicking link…)
If the above link does not work, copy the entire link, without spaces, and paste it into your internet browser.
Click the “Request to Join ” link in the upper right corner (if you do not have a Facebook account set up, you must click on the green “Sign Up” button at the top of the page and set up an account before you may join the group).
Resources from Dr. Huizenga
Stop the agony of the affair! Find your strength and courage! Learn how to shake his/her world. Pinpoint the most powerful strategies to stop the affair. Learn exactly what to say and when to say it (according to one of the 7 different types of affairs). Get the highly acclaimed e-book, “Break Free From the Affair.”
Both of you are committed (well, mostly) to rebuilding the relationship. Learn how to rebuild trust slowly but surely. Learn how to avoid the “swirl” and eliminate judgments and put downs. Move beyond need-meeting. Go beyond confrontation. Go beyond making amends. Create a relationship appropriate for new intimacy. Get Dr. Huizenga’s e-book: Marriage Makeover.
Learn how to feel human again. Discover that your pain in NORMAL. Listen to others – perhaps in a situation identical to yours – poignantly express their confusion and pain and then in a few minutes begin to feel their strength and power to face their future, with or without him/her. These 19 Live Coaching Sessions with Dr. Huizenga will be your listening companion. You can take his words with you.
Be determined to learn as much as you can, to find your strength and courage to use new skills and and develop an outlook that will stop the affair and reshape my life and relationship to what I really want. Download all of Dr. Huizenga’s e-books, “Discovery to Recovery,” Can your Marriage be Saved?” “What will Happen Next?” “Should I Spy?” “Barriers to a Marriage Makeover,” as well as his full articles, Newsletter archive and more.
Must you talk through your problems? Some think them through. Talking through often leads to new strategies never previously considered. It increases your confidence and self esteem. Talking affirms that you really are OK, helps you move through the affair more quickly and begins the process of designing the life and relationships you truly desire. Contact Dr. Huizenga to set up coaching sessions that will rebuild YOU and keep you on the right track.
Should you Stay or Should you Go?
I recommend another resource to help you cope with infidelity. One of my online colleagues, Dr. Frank Gunzburg, offers a wealth of information that compliments Break Free From the Affair.
Dr. Gunzburg has done an amazing job of breaking down all
the steps that both the injured, the cheater and then the
couple need to go through if they want to heal their relationship.
He’s got 3 specific phases that he encourages his readers to go through and you can start the program even if your spouse isn’t willing.
You can read about Frank’s great material by using this link:
Please click for Frank’s great material