Feature Article Get New Resource Support and Guidance Send to Family/Friends Recommended Sites Feature Article The KEY Question You Ask and MUST have Answered even though you probably don’t know you are asking it. Part II. I stirred the pot. Boy did I get the emails with the article: The KEY Question You Ask and MUST have Answered even though you probably don’t know you are asking it. If you missed it go to my blog and read the article. I've observed thousands of people suffering from infidelity and, from my point of view, there is one underlying question that almost all ask. After a time of reflection and work at healing the pain, they "get it" and the question is answered. I didn't divulge in the article "the question." Hence the emails: WHAT IS THE QUESTION? I feel compelled to follow up. I am very reluctant to give you the question for a number of solid reasons. 1. First, I don't want you to give me too much power. And, power is a key issue. In reality, I don't want you to give anyone more power than they deserve. This is often the case in infidelity. The offended partner often gives excessive power to the partner and or the other person. Every word and thought of the offended partner tends to hang on what the offending partner is saying or doing or not saying or doing. The offended spouse feels victimized, helpless and at the mercy of the other relationship. Why in the world would anyone give that much power to a person(s) who is clueless, lost and committing slow relational and familial suicide? And, often, when shifts in that power are made by the offended partner, dramatic changes occur. I hear it daily from those I coach and send me testimonials on the power of Break Free From the Affair. I want you to claim your power. Don't hand it over easily, even to me! 2. If I told you, you probably wouldn't believe me. In some ways the question is fairly obvious and you may dismiss it as too simplistic. 3. If I told you, you probably would brush it off and move on to something else. Oh, so that is THE QUESTION he is talking about! OK, now that my curiosity is fed I can answer the next question in my life. I don't want you to brush off this question. I want you to look at it - with great intensity. 4. The question is found in YOUR journey to healing and peace. The question (and answer) will not come from an external source (such as me) but from within you. Now, since I know what that question is I can be there for you on that journey and be your guide. But, ultimately, it is you who will discover it. And when you do you will see powerful, wonderfully lasting changes in how you feel and think - guaranteed. I keep telling people that redesigning your life and relationships after infidelity typically takes 2-4 years for those who struggle on their own. My goal is to accelerate that process for you, cutting it down to 6-18 months. I offer you the Infidelity Insider Membership for that very purpose: providing you the support, encouragement and resources you need to break free more quickly and powerfully well. Remember infidelity is your gift. Yes, I mean that! I've read hundreds of books on relationships. Have logged over 30,000 hours of giving direct face to face therapy. Have over a 1,000 hours of supervision as a marriage therapist and yet, I learned the most about infidelity from the infidelity in my marriage. And, it took me a while to learn it! (maybe I'm a little slow!). I was able to turn the proverbial lemon into lemonade. I think so many respond so positively to my material and me, because I discovered the question and the answer from the tearing of the fabric in my life. God it hurt. But I was blessed with it as well. So how do you name the question and experience the answer? Here's a posting from someone who is very very close! Listen to her and then take a few minutes to see which of these questions is most painfully pressing on you: Does it matter what any of the answers to my questions are? Once I know all the answers — what’s the question I ultimately want to answer? Spend some time with this. What do YOU think the question is? What is THE question right now, YOU are asking? Please gift others with your thoughts by posting a comment on the blog or responding in the forum of Infidelity Insider. Get New Resource FREE Laser coaching... to help you begin...getting up in the morning with a plan and hope for your future, even though infidelity tears at your life. Free Laser coaching:
Dr. Huizenga is offering FREE 15 minute Laser coaching sessions to the first 16 who register. Also, the first 16 will receive a FREE Lifetime Membership in Infidelity Insider - the new extensive resource center of infidelity materials and forum. This is YOUR opportunity to take advantage of Dr Huizenga's expertise and years of experience and forge a new direction in your life. This is also your opportunity to help others. You know the impact of infidelity. You know the confusion. You know the pain. You know the sense of betrayal. You know that you can think of nothing else. Wouldn't it be nice to hear others share a similar story and hear an expert walk through that story with him/her and create an ending that serves all? That's what we will have. Dr Huizenga is taping these sessions. Don't fear! Once the session begins to flow, you will lose concern about the taping. These taped sessions will be made available online. This will prove to be a truly invaluable resource for anyone stumbling through infidelity. Yes, you can help. You can contribute. Not all of the sessions will be placed online. Dr Huizenga will choose the most helpful sessions and place those online. If, after the session, you have serious reservations about the session made public, let Dr Huizenga know and the session will not be published. Here's the schedule:
Here's all you need to do right now: Send an email to RPlantinga@fountainhillcenter.com, his assistant, Becky, letting her know what time you want. Becky will reply with a confirmation and instructions for the call. Take advantage of this great opportunity. Support and Guidance
I launched the Infidelity Insider Members Only Area a couple weeks ago and over 1650 of you joined. If you haven't joined, do so now. All of my resources are being moved to Infidelity Insider. As well, Infidelity Insider will be the home for all new resources. Imagine having access to hundreds of pages, audio tapes, a forum all conveniently located in one place, at your fingertips! All of my content
will be transferred to the Infidelity Insider. I'm collecting (once I find all of them) my resources and placing them in the Member's Area. Infidelity Insider Members will have access to everything from one convenient page. As well the Infidelity Insider will offer:
The forum is especially needed. I had a forum, but it was "public" and a hacker hacked so badly, I had to ditch it. Now, in the Infidelity Insider not only will you have a safe and private place to meet others and read what others, like you, experience as they cope with infidelity. And I will not have to worry about hackers. If you haven't purchased Break Free From the Affair, you can do so now in Infidelity Insider at a 20% discount. Jump on it. Find out more about Infidelity Insider and what it provides for you! Send to Family/Friends Thinking of family or friends who might benefit from this Newsletter? Thank you! We hope you find the relationships that give you the Recommended Sites Please visit these sites for more highly recommended resources: |
April 3 , 2007 Archived articles Break Free From The Affair E-book Testimonials Home Page
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The KEY Question You Ask and MUST have Answered even though you probably don’t know you are asking it. Part II.
