Feature Article
2 Infidelity Myths Blown out of the Water By Break Free
Diagnosing the Affair and Creating a Healing Plan for Your Specific Type of Affair Generates Confidence, Destroys Common Infidelity Myths and Sets You Free to Do What is Most Effective
Discovering that there are 7 unique types of affairs is often the first step to breaking free.
Most of you have given very little thought to infidelity (unless you read the headlines of the frequent politicians that wander) until it faces you.
Infidelity is a word for someone else. Or, it's a word that triggers very general thoughts of being unfaithful with someone else.
But, when it happens to you it's pain power is unleashed. All your general thoughts, preconceived ideas, myths and stereotypes about infidelity strike at your heart.
And, then you read where there are different kinds of affairs, 7 unique kinds as I describe.
And you enter a new world, of awareness, of healing and of restoration.
Hundreds of readers of "Break Free From the Affair" have written gushing about their new found hope and freedom from the infidelity pain.
"Why is this?" I've asked myself on a number of occasions. Why the dramatic changes - merely after reading "Break Free From the Affair" for an hour or two?
Here's my conclusion: I'm not persuading anyone that they should try to feel better and have hope. Nor, do I try to hype people with false hope. I have no magic pill.
However, by reading "Break Free From the Affair," realizing the complexity of infidelity, seeing your cheating spouse in the personality descriptions and identifying the type of affair facing you, your original thinking about your partners affair that was generating a boat load of pain, fear, anger and confusion is torn down and reframed.
You see and feel in your bones for the first time in your life that the Affair is HIS/HER Problem. It is THEIR Problem
One day it hits you between the eyes (or in the gut) that your spouse is cheating.
What's one of your first thoughts? If you are like many it's "Oh my God, what did I do wrong? where did I go wrong? Where did I blow it?"
You may not consciously think that, but believe me, for most it's there. And this cancerous thought becomes a seedbed for self loathing. And out of that self-loathing you shoot yourself in the foot - again, and again.. and again.
What is PROVEN to you when you read "Break Free From the Affair?"
This is what sinks into every fiber of your body and soul: What you did or did not do did not "cause" the affair. S/He CHOSE that avenue to solve his/her dilemma. Did you make mistakes? Sure, we all do. Could you have done some things differently? Of course! S/He could have also! You are NOT defective. No one is a better lover or person than you. Nothing is wrong with you!
And secondly, you learn that affairs and infidelity have absolutely NOTHING to do with "love."
Another first thought is: "My spouse is in love with someone else; s/he fell out of love with me." (nothing is more painful than to believe that you are no longer loved or that love has been transferred to a competitor. Ugly feeling! Plus you learned from grocery counter magazines, romance novels, movies, and TV that affairs are about falling out of love with your spouse and in love with someone else. )
"Break Free From the Affair PROVES to you, "Wrong!" Affairs and infidelity have nothing to do with love.
They have everything to do with extreme personal neediness or life crippling patterns of thinking and behavior that preceded you and almost guaranteed that s/he would address those crippling patterns by engaging in infidelity.
Affairs have nothing to do with love. And now you know why!
Siggggghhhhhhhhhhhh....
You are on the road to not merely surviving the infidelity but transforming your life and relationships.
Want more? Please go to my blog where I present 2 case studies of surviving infidelity.
The woman in the first case study talks about the "who's at fault" issue.
In the second case study the woman gives a through explanation of how her strategies helped stop the affair after two months and their process of rebuilding the marriage over the past 4 months.
Please read the case study and leave a comment. Click the comment button at the bottom of the article and leave your thoughts.
Your comments are gold. Deposit them.
As per last week...
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If you didn't do this last week... Once you've left your comment and have bookmarked the page(s), drop me an email (bob@bobhuizenga.com) and I will send you a gift.
You will receive the Personal Foundation Program. This Program has been used literally by thousands and probably millions by now to redesign their lives. It cost me big money to buy the rights to secure permission to give to you this program. You cannot buy it in a store, online, anywhere, that I know of.I've used it over the past 10 years and it has changed my life.
It's extensive (you can easily spend a couple years on the exercises) is practical (workbook format) and covers any area you want to work on in your life.
It's in a pdf download format that you can save, print out, etc.
Again, send me an email telling me you have left a comment and bookmarked my pages and I will give you a download link.
I appreciate your help! Bob
